Toonbots archive - episode published 20011129
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In yet another flagrant interruption of what would seem to be an established storyline, the metacartoonist utilizes a modality suggested
by the inimitable Lord Emsworth (who is, as we well know, Cool Enough) -- commercial-message-as-art-form; in so doing, of course, he has
exposed the storyline to eminent danger of abandonment, due to the handy bridge in the last panel. Meanwhile, back at the ranch, trouble
is afoot!
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The script used to make this toon:
<cartoon height="1100" width="900" rowformat="1"> <panel> <caption location="middle" fgcolor="orange">When last we saw our intrepid adventurers, they had just returned to the Kremlin for a Defenestration day repast, and were on the verge of entering the next phase of the song, and all you have to do to join in is to wait until those four chords come around....</caption> </panel> <panel> <caption location="middle" fgcolor="black">BUT FIRST, A WORD FROM OUR SPONSORS!</caption> </panel> <panel rowdir="h"> <panel> <character name="lenin"/> <caption location="bottom middle" fgcolor="red">Ouch!</caption> </panel> <panel> <character name="will"/> <caption location="bottom right" fgcolor="blue" font="itcedscr" size="24">Well met, Len! But stay! of what complainest?</caption> </panel> </panel> <panel rowdir="h"> <panel> <character name="lenin" aspect="faceright"/> <caption location="top left" fgcolor="red">It's these darned smoking scorpions, Will!<br/> They keep stinging and they don't give me the satisfaction I want.</caption> </panel> <panel> <caption location="top right" fgcolor="blue" font="itcedscr" size="24">Hadst but tried Daggett and Myers Rolled Ants, needst not suffer so!</caption> <caption location="bottom left" fgcolor="red">D&M, eh? Thanks, Will! I'll try them!</caption> </panel> </panel> <panel rowdir="h"> <panel> <caption location="top left" fcolor="blue">LATER...</caption> <caption location="bottom left" fgcolor="red">Hey, Will!<br/>I tried D&M Rolled Ants, and they hit the spot! </caption> </panel> <panel> <caption location="top right" fgcolor="blue" font="itcedscr" size="24">Hahahaha!</caption> <caption location="bottom left" fgcolor="red">HAHAHAHA!</caption> <character name="lenin" action="leaves"/> <character name="will" action="leaves"/> </panel> </panel> <panel> <caption location="middle" fgcolor="black">DAGGETT AND MYERS. WE ROLL ANTS, SO YOU DON'T HAVE TO.</caption> <caption location="bottom middle" fgcolor="grey" size="10">Rolled ants not legal in all municipalities; user is responsible for compliance with local, state, and federal law. Friends don't let friends smoke arthropods and <br/>operate heavy machinery. May cause heartburn, stomach upset, gangrene, spontaneous combustion, gamma radiation, manifestation of mutant powers,<br/>multiple orgasm, uncontrollable levitation, visual or auditory hallucination, Gilligan's Island reruns, drowning, invisibility, obesity, warp core breach, port<br/>scanning, Port Authority, router failure, freon loss, hair loss, loss of weight, loss of appetite, dental floss, breach of contract or other effects.</caption> </panel> <panel> <character name="lenin"/> <caption location="top middle" fgcolor="red">Hey, I thought Pickle Crisp was sponsoring this storyline.</caption> <caption location="bottom right" fgcolor="blue">NEXT: !</caption> </panel> </cartoon> |
