Michael Fri Aug 31 01:35:43 2001|
mouse, you need a title. You've got 24 posts on the board and you're obviously in the Jihad beyond hope of redemption.
mouse Fri Aug 31 15:18:17 2001|
'beyond hope of redemption' ??!? *eek*
well after discovering i am also involved with an interzonic spy network, i was thinking 'innocent pawn' might give me some plausible deniability (actually at first i thought 'innocent dupe' but then decided this would encourage you all to stick me with the checks) -- or possibly 'tool of the masses', to stick with the red theme.
on the other hand, this might cause people to view me as a weak or insignificant individual, whereas i am, of course, the center of the universe. (no, i have thought this over _very_ carefully, and it makes absolutely no sense whatsoever unless _i_ am the center)(yes, i know it still doesn't make very _much_ sense - my motto is, anything is better than nothing).
or i could go with my informal title here, 'knower of all things', because of course i do know everything of importance (it's an informal title because i can't actually get anyone else to use it).
oh wait - nd already has 'reverend doctor king godzilla the all-knowing' so that might be confusing.
i always wanted to be a defender of something.....how about 'defender of logical thought and other lost causes'?
(wow --- a _title_! does it come with a crown? or even a tiara....)
mouse Sun Sep 2 12:58:15 2001|
ok - you don't like any of them. ok, i can deal with that (breath deep, release slowly, you are _not_ panicking)
(or are you mad about the crown? i wasn't thinking about a _big_ one - i'm just new at this title thing and i was really excited and i guess i just assumed -- i mean, i could start with just a paper one)
ok, think, think, think.....ok, 'logical thought' could maybe be perceived as anti-toonbots (altho you know logic and rationality are not necessarily related - toonbots may be irrational but i sometimes think of it as sorta like sqrt(-1) (is that the one i'm thinking of?) - you know, by definition irrational but with its own sorta internal logic -- and my own personal logic can be quite astounding, i have reduced entire professors to slack-jawed awe (i'm sure it was awe)) - but, you know, i'm not _married_ to it or anything...
(is it cause i can't do aphorisms? -- i was going through this big noodle thing, but then it turned into more of a pasta thing (what with the fresh tomatos (tomatoes?) and everything) (and besides the place where i was eating lunch charged extra for fortune cookies so i felt silly asking for them) and despite friday (everyone at work was _gone_) i don't really feel compelled to respond to _everything_, when people are on a roll i like to just sit back and enjoy (i did think about offering to spiff up a random number generator so you could put lotto numbers on the back)(i could still do that if it would help))
i did like the idea of being a defender, but i could start small if you think i'm not up to the big stuff - defender of eggplants? protector of small fussy kitty-cats? patron of fresh tomato(e)s?
ok, i'll work on it - i'll get back to you. (even just a sash maybe - you guys have sashes, don't you?)
Brother Emsworth Sun Sep 2 14:29:27 2001|
> ok - you don't like any of them. ok, i can deal with that (breath deep,
> release slowly, you are _not_ panicking)
Excitable mouse like over-engineered radio... much too wired.
Honorable Mr. Roberts may have simply overlooked your earlier post, but he might also have been slightly confused by the message, and uncertain as to what your final choice of title was. A simple statement of which title you had in mind is generally sufficient, after all.
Regarding regal attire or whatnot, apart from honorable gopher's sacerdotal leather vestments, very little in regard to same has been officially sanctioned by the PAFTWJ for any rank, after all (and such attire is almost invariable meta-fictional, after all.) Still, if you want a sash, we might try to work something out, assuming the wolverines don't get into the cloths and linens again.
In regard to aphorisms (or "Channisms," as humble self and honorable Chris have been calling them), we wouldn't mind if others were to attempt same, but have no objection to being like lone baseball player at Wrigley... alone in the field. (Mind, we also have no objection to reassurance that honorable Jihad members had actually noticed the Channisms.)
Finally, and in all seriousness, there's something I've been thinking about for some time. I don't mean to sound unfriendly or anything, and I'm the first to admit that I've made rather careless typos on more occasions than I'd have liked, but it would be appreciated if perhaps you'd be a little more careful regarding capitalization, or rather the absence thereof. Personally, I usually find that messages seem much more coherent when proper capitalization and punctuation are used, especially in longer messages. Of course, if it's a form of self expression or an attempt to emulate e. e. cummings, that's something else, I suppose. Again, I don't mean to give undue offense, but any attention given to the usage of capital letters would be like rapidly increasing value of certain stocks... much appreciated.
Michael Sun Sep 2 20:55:37 2001|
> A simple statement of which title you
> had in mind is generally sufficient, after all.
I figured I'd let the whole thing sit a while and see if anything was obvious. I kinda like "Defender of Logical Thought" except that, as has been remarked, it would be somewhat out of place in the Jihad. And the "lost cause" makes it too long (nd was really insistent about the All-Knowing Godzilla thing.)
> (Mind, we also have no objection to
> reassurance that honorable Jihad members had actually noticed the
I like them. I could see Lenin picking that habit up. Or Hick. Hmm. Or the Bot, except that the Bot would get the punch line wrong, of course. Dubya might do well with it. I'm going to have to give it all some thought.
> regarding capitalization, or rather the absence
Emsworth! It's a style! Ease up! Even her *name* is in lowercase, after all!
mouse Mon Sep 3 12:42:52 2001|
> Emsworth! It's a style! Ease up! Even her *name* is in lowercase, after
it's also sort of the written version of - i guess a deep breathing exercise. as brother emsworth has pointed out, i can be a bit excitable (somehow this seems to be getting worse since the recent "election"). one does try to remain somewhat informed about the world at large so i listen to NPR on the car radio in the morning and it's just me in the car so I start thinking about the things I hear, and I end up (clearly _foolishly_) trying to follow things to logical conclusions, you know, like why are we so worried about test results in _schools_ when what we REALLY need is tests for _politicians_ like in, say, MATH so that when some sort-of-elected officials' OWN PEOPLE come up with estimates of budget surpluses of ONLY $1B, same officials DON'T expect $13B INCREASES in the military budget FOR PROGRAMS THAT DON'T EVEN _WORK_ and then expect Congress to cut spending FOR STUFF THAT SAME SEMI-OFFICIALS _ASKED_ _FOR_ I*N T*H*E F*I*R*S*T P*L*A*C*E!!!#@%!!! AND WE WON"T EVEN _MENTION_ THE WAY HE KEEPS THROWING OUT F*R*E*E STUFF LIKE, SAY, _*T*R*E*A*T*I*E*S_!?!!!! WHY DOESN"T THIS FORUM HAVE BOLD FACE???!!!! I NEED MORE FONTS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
*pant*pant*pant*pant*pant* (breathe in deeply, breathe out slowly, breathe in deeply, hold.....)
so anyway.....now i just try to keep really....calm. which is easier to do if i keep my voice down.
(also i figured if i talked softly, i would avoid waking the wolverines. tell them it's all ok now, i'm going home.)
(oh, and michael - thank you for the title. (probably it is best if i stick with eggplants, defending logical thought may be a bit too risky for innocent bystanders)(and you guys too))
Michael Mon Sep 3 16:50:41 2001|
> AND WE WON"T EVEN _MENTION_
> THE WAY HE KEEPS THROWING OUT F*R*E*E STUFF LIKE, SAY,
Defense of logical thought in today's America is clearly a hopeless task. I just try not to think about it. I did vote in the majority, as I think is clear from the strip, and I feel pretty bad about things if I think too hard.
I was thinking of a column: People who _Don't Get It_ -- but there are just so many. I may still. I need to harness the political power inherent in my vast fanbase.
"People who _Don't Get It_" -- now viewed by over twenty people!
mouse Mon Sep 3 22:22:57 2001|
i try not to think about it either, but some times it just sneaks up on me. still, it keeps me reading things like toonbot.
if you want, you can use my new motto for your column: "The More I See of Politicians, the Better I Like Eggplant" (you can tell Br. E. i put in caps just for him)
Jenn Mon Sep 10 08:31:42 2001|
The detrimental effects of caffiene
Ahhhhh. So nice to come back from vacation and have even more posts on the forum than when I left. However that worked, I applaud and think Michael should get his own sash for the system.
I have one thing to say (well, except for liking capitalization...though I figured out after a couple of posts that it's more style than laziness so I decided not to say anything, lest I get yelled at...heh): We heard on tv while on vacation that they've found that the first morning cup of coffee hardens your arteries and increases your blood pressure.
mouse. Um...hon...you might want to think about less caffiene, now that it's got new and improved ability to knock you over dead. Less caffiene might also make it easier for Emsworth and me to understand ya. (Because it seems unlikely to me that the posts I just read result from an uninduced state.) Just a thought. Or heck...do Emsworth and I /really/ need to understand? That's possibly somewhat egotistical of me.
Sashes. My final thought is sashes. Can mine read 'Most Likely to Spend a Week in Maine and Not See a Single Moose'?
mouse Mon Sep 10 15:08:09 2001|
Re: The detrimental effects of caffiene
> figured out after a couple of posts that it's more style than laziness
well some of it's laziness too. in my defense, i would like to point out that even without caps, my grammar is _excellant_. (honestly, you people and your dependence on petty boureois trappings like capital letters -- how do you read runes? or latin, even - they don't even bother with word order).
i had considered phasing in capitals, but now that i know it's making you all crazy....NEVER!!!!HAHAHAHAHA!
> mouse. Um...hon...you might want to think about less caffiene, now that
> it's got new and improved ability to knock you over dead.
don't know how to break this to you -- but i practically never drink coffee. (i drink tea, but only 2 cups/day, made from the same teabag. if i feel really wild and crazy, i get a new bag for the second cup).
oddly enough, i heard something on NPR this weekend about caffeine aiding in reasoning power and increasing hand-eye coordination. it also said that coffee helped fuel the industrial revolution by helping people get up in the am and not spend the afternoons lying around sloshed, and it helped bring in the modern concept of time -- which is more than enough reason to boycott the whole concept, i say.
(you were well to avoid moose anyway. they like to stand in the middle of the road and wreck cars)
Jenn Tue Sep 11 07:45:57 2001|
Okay, so caffiene has it's benefits, too...
> i had considered phasing in capitals, but now that i know it's making you
> all crazy....NEVER!!!!HAHAHAHAHA!
Well...if it makes you feel better, I'm sure Emsworth and I would be just as crazy in all capitals...or have you considered braille? You could do all periods. Or morse code. I'm not sure how that works, though. Dot-slash, isn't it?
> don't know how to break this to you -- but i practically never drink
So basically, we have to find another reason for the somewhat...shall we say...manic posts? Well...medication has been known to help...(I'm joking! No flaming!)
As to the NPR caffeine stuff, yeah, I watched a thing on PBS about caffiene and nicotine. I'm trying to remember...I think caffiene was the one that improves eye hand coordination remarkably with the first dose, but then performance crashes as you increase the amount. In addition, once the body becomes addicted to the substance, which occurs with a rapidity only topped by crack and nicotine, the improvements in coordination are swiftly negated by the shaking of withdrawal. I could have this mixed up with nicotine, though. I tend to lump things together. Maybe some intrepid member of the Jihad watched that and can help me out?
> (you were well to avoid moose anyway. they like to stand in the middle of
> the road and wreck cars)
We /did/ see a life size chocolate moose. 1700 pounds of chocolate. It was a good, good trip!
mouse Tue Sep 11 10:43:37 2001|
Re: Okay, so caffiene has it's benefits, too...
> So basically, we have to find another reason for the somewhat...shall we
> say...manic posts? Well...medication has been known to help
hey - i'm turned on by _life_, babies, i don't need no drugs. actually i am just a naturally enthusiastic and effervescent person.
some might even say bubbly.
Michael Sun Sep 2 20:56:28 2001|
> defender of eggplants?
Sim sala bim, so mote it be. I can't pass that one up, it's too good.